Riddle me This?

Okay I want to know by the show of hands class lmao, how many of you have ever heard of the "Master Cleanse Diet" or have heard and tried it? Yeah right you know you have atleast heard of it.

So let me tell you about this diet from all that I can base it on. I can base it on research as well as ummm yep I am trying it lol. Okay well I had heard about this from one of the nurses that works with me as well as a friend that used to be a nurse in a chiropracters office. I thought hmmm maybe there is some validity to it and maybe not.

Well basically this is a cleanse not a weight loss diet. Okay first of all the drink itself screams dieuretic that is all that it is with some sugar from a high grade syrup. So yes you will be in the bathroom eliminating yourself til you want to scream.

Okay you start off with 10 ounces of water to two tablespoons of lemon juice, two tablespoons of maple syrup grade B not the cheap stuff that you eat on your pancakes, and about a quarter of a teaspoon of cayenne pepper. I made up two one quart containers for the morning half and will do another two for the afternoon. I have already drink two quarts of tea and have had almost two quarts of water. Trust me you will want to have the water to drink just to rinse the taste out of your mouth.

This cleanse is recommended for anywhere from 3-14 days at a time. You eat and I repeat you eat no solid foods during this fast. Okay so it may not sound so bad the first half the drink and all which I will admit it is not. Most of you know I am a pizzaholic and omg this is gonna do me in but I am trying it for how many days remains to be determined but this is day ONE.

As I read more and more about this incredibly easy yet painless thing to do I noticed it said you were not hungry or that you didn't get hunger pains as often. Okay now that I have picked myself up from the floor refer to the above paragraph I typed the word pizza and hung on to all five letters of the word wishing it would jump from the screen into my mouth. So I am going to go on the assumption that this is just the initial day of HELL and the rest will all be downhill from here.

Okay but there is more to this than that. See the cleanse doesn't stop with the dieuretic drink oh no the not so fun part of it comes in the evening. So devote atleast an hour and a half to the nearest possible room to your bathroom. This is the cleanse part. Ewww yuck yep you betcha it is. Just reading about it makes you go uggghhhhh.

Okay for this part of it you need 32 ounces or one quart of water boiled to tea temp drinking water. Add 2 level Teaspoons of natural seasalt unrefined and not iodized. You can add the juice from a lemon or lime to offset the taste. And remember stay near the bathroom.

As I said I just started this today so I will be able to tell you how that actually works tomorrow. I have already drink 2 quarts of water, 2 quarts of the tea and will be making another two quarts of the tea and another two quarts of water and then the flush this evening so my day is going to be bathroom bound lol. Keep checking back for progress updates.